I should be on a cruise ship today winding my way through the southern Caribbean away from the Panama Canal and towards Cozumel. But, instead, I am sitting in my favorite chair talking to a computer while the wind blows the wet leaves around in the yard. We had been planning this cruise for almost a year to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary. I just wanted to cruise; I told Jeff he could pick the place. (He chose a Panama Canal route)
Anyone we know who has done much cruising has said that they had never heard of it happening before, but it did to us. Four days before we were to sail, a travel agency called us, explaining that our cruise had been overbooked and they were looking for a few people to change their cruise date in exchange for a "sweet" package offered by the cruise line. We were originally booked in a small stateroom (category BE) and they wanted to move us up to a mini-suite with a balcony (category AA) PLUS give us $1500 on-board credit (of which if there was a remaining amount at the end of the cruise, they would refund as cash).
This sounded too good to be true, so we called back through directly to the cruise line to ask them to validate this offer. They, in turn, connected us back to this same travel agency, who gave us the same offer again. The only catch was that we would have to sail between December 10th and April 10th.
As much as instant gratification is tempting, I knew that we could not possibly go in December. I already have a syndrome (yet unnamed by the medical world) about living out Christmas in this American society. After many years of quiet, uncomplicated, simple Christmases in West Africa, the appeal of the lights, advertisements, endless scheduling of events, and the pressure of finding just the right gift -- well, just doesn't appeal to me. After four years of living back in America, I am actually able to find some joy and sanity in this season by making my own rules -- not living under the traditional ones that makes sure that every ounce of joy and energy is taken away from you by the time December 25th gets here. (DO NOT make the wrong assumption that I hate Christmas. I do not. It is a special, significant time of year. But our society has stretched it so out of proportion and I have chosen not to celebrate in that way - but that will be for another blog later on)
Back to my cruising story. Because of the nature of our work/ministry, finding another date that would work would be tedious at best. But, we did find a window of opportunity in the middle of January. Now, how about that? The holidays will be past, our stint in a very demanding, extra ministry will have ended a week earlier, and there are no leaves to watch change in vivid colors right before our eyes - it's the dead of winter! And we'll be on a cruise ship, in a mini-suite with $1500 that we would not have had otherwise.....
Oh yeah, I can sit here with contentment today and watch the burnished leaves on the maples in my backyard and feel the cool breezes of fall succumbing to the brisk wind of winter waiting his turn. But when ol' man winter enters with a vengenance, I'll don my bathing suit and shorts, and head for the gangplank!
************************************************************************************
Another thought that comforts me as I (mistakenly) look around this room is to know that there will be no washing machines in heaven! I just don't know why keeping up with clothes should be such a daunting task. Perhaps it's because there are still two teenagers GIRLS living in this house. Everywhere I turn there are either piles of unfolded clothes, folded clothes that no one wants to claim enough to take to her room, or dirty clothes strewed over the small laundry room floor. Sometimes it's enough to make me want to live in the buff.......well, I'm kidding, of course, but it's just that moment of insanity that comes when things feel out of control.
So, enough tidbits this morning. Time to pronounce war on the cotton/rayon/spandex/nylon world that surrounds me!
Happy fall, ya'll!!
28 October 2006
03 October 2006
Life Behind Our Inner Eyelids
After years of counseling and dealing with people of all ages, all walks of life, and in all kinds of situations, I have methodically come to a very poignant conclusion. Actually I had never put into words what in my "gut" I knew; someone else did it for me.
As I was coming home for my daughter's volleyball game last week, I was doing a scan through radio channels. I stopped the scan as I heard the word depression. It was a voice that I had heard way back in the past (okay, so I'm older than I think I am). Back in my Bible college and early missionary years, we were often presented with the basic and foundational preaching of Dr. Lehman Strauss. It has been years since I have heard his name or thought about his penetrating preaching of God's word. The message that I was able to listen to the other night was as timely as any I have ever heard on the subject of "depression".
Hear me loud and clear. I am clinical enough in my perceptions to realize, accept, and concur that some depressive behavior can be caused by chemical imbalances in a person's body left unchecked. I have seen that firsthand in Africa working with war victims, in my own family as we dealt with the long-term illness and subsequent death of my brother, and with others close to me that have dealt with sudden or latent reality of trauma or a life out of control. In effect, depression can be a result of the body's response to life as it is dealt to us. Chemically-induced or self-induced, the results are the same. Though I am not inclined to say that depression, in its purist form, is a disease; I do believe there are underlying physical and psychological results that can lock themselves into the body in a disease-like fashion.
I am no doctor nor ascribed psychologist, at least not with a piece of paper hanging on the wall. I will classify that right now, so there is no recognition, medical journal, or academic credit waiting at the end of this spill. It is simply out of my gift of discernment, God-given perception about people, about life, and about how God's power must play in the midst of all that I desire to say these things out loud.
I am just flatout concerned for Christians who are caught up in the clinical diagnoses of depression without giving not one whit of concern to the spiritual aspect (which is more our own responsibility). We have played into the hands of this societal way of thinking that our problems are someone else's fault. As Christians, this is not a biblical nor healthy outlook.
When we live our lives for "us" and only "us", we are men or women most miserable. When we concentrate on what comes our way or doesn't come our way, how people treat us or how they mistreat us, how we are understood or misunderstood, how life sends us rain or sunshine, and how we deserve so much more than is on our plate at a given moment -- it is a debilitating exercise that will naturally bring on depressive symptoms. Just this week I have counseled two twenty-something young women churning inside this kind of mindset right now. One is having trouble sleeping at night, cannot ever rest her mind or spirit, is precariously thin, and feels she has lost connection with her family in some sense. She has needed the encouragement from her parents, but because of their own intrinsic struggles, they have not been able to give any of this support to her.
So, this young lady is stuck in this vacuum of "self" - churning around in her heart, head, and soul, the inclination that she cannot control any part of her life because she does not have what she needs from others. While she has an outstanding philosophical knowledge of God and His Word, her personal relationship based on faith and grace is stilted and ineffective at this point.
The other young woman has been hit with the same thing. Her family base is far away, so she has thrown the dice of her heart and well-being into the hands of friends in this city. When she faced an incredibly difficult family situation that shook her to her very core, instead of concentrating on God's grace, mercy, and power, she concentrated on what she was NOT receiving from her friends. After dwelling on this for quite some time, she made the blunt, but not unpredictable decision to break off all ties and find new friends, a new support base.
Perhaps there is a time and place for that kind of action, but it is not the ultimate answer to any problem in life. The clear and harsh fact is that people will disappoint us, even those who are joined to us at the hip, so to speak. If who we are is all about how others treat us, what they say to us, what they do for us, how they hold us up and encourage us......then we are in serious trouble. Lehman Strauss, in his sermon on depression and the Christian, spoke of the self-centered nature of many depressed Christians, and how it is difficult to see past how life/others have treated them. He, too, had counseled numerous Christians who had succumbed to the belief that life had dealt unfairly with them. Anytime we dwell on the fair vs. the unfair, we will lose the reasoning battle. It is a dangerous and defeating place to dwell.
Both of these young women are experiencing varying degrees of depression. Instinctively, I do not believe that either of them are chemically imbalanced. Yes, the correct diet can help some, exercise can always help, and perhaps taking herbs and vitamins can diminish some of the symptoms of depression.
But, ultimately, we have to face up to the reality that there is no one on this earth who is completely responsible for us. However, there is hope. God paid the price through the giving of His Son to the death of the cross more than 2000 years ago to prove that He, and He alone, is willing and totally able to take responsibility of us: body, soul, and spirit.
In essence, the penalty of living an "all about me" life is constant pain, loneliness, and disillusionment with those around us. When we refocus our eyes on God, our Heavenly Father, and His desire to make us complete through His Son (Colossians 1:18), it is a step in the right direction. Focusing extrinsically on others is a healing balm like none other. Dwelling on the amazing beauty found in this earth is like fresh, cool water to a dry throat. Looking outward and upward is the key to stepping out of the pothole of disenchantment with life as we see it from our inner eyelids.
Let's open our eyes and step into the Light.
As I was coming home for my daughter's volleyball game last week, I was doing a scan through radio channels. I stopped the scan as I heard the word depression. It was a voice that I had heard way back in the past (okay, so I'm older than I think I am). Back in my Bible college and early missionary years, we were often presented with the basic and foundational preaching of Dr. Lehman Strauss. It has been years since I have heard his name or thought about his penetrating preaching of God's word. The message that I was able to listen to the other night was as timely as any I have ever heard on the subject of "depression".
Hear me loud and clear. I am clinical enough in my perceptions to realize, accept, and concur that some depressive behavior can be caused by chemical imbalances in a person's body left unchecked. I have seen that firsthand in Africa working with war victims, in my own family as we dealt with the long-term illness and subsequent death of my brother, and with others close to me that have dealt with sudden or latent reality of trauma or a life out of control. In effect, depression can be a result of the body's response to life as it is dealt to us. Chemically-induced or self-induced, the results are the same. Though I am not inclined to say that depression, in its purist form, is a disease; I do believe there are underlying physical and psychological results that can lock themselves into the body in a disease-like fashion.
I am no doctor nor ascribed psychologist, at least not with a piece of paper hanging on the wall. I will classify that right now, so there is no recognition, medical journal, or academic credit waiting at the end of this spill. It is simply out of my gift of discernment, God-given perception about people, about life, and about how God's power must play in the midst of all that I desire to say these things out loud.
I am just flatout concerned for Christians who are caught up in the clinical diagnoses of depression without giving not one whit of concern to the spiritual aspect (which is more our own responsibility). We have played into the hands of this societal way of thinking that our problems are someone else's fault. As Christians, this is not a biblical nor healthy outlook.
When we live our lives for "us" and only "us", we are men or women most miserable. When we concentrate on what comes our way or doesn't come our way, how people treat us or how they mistreat us, how we are understood or misunderstood, how life sends us rain or sunshine, and how we deserve so much more than is on our plate at a given moment -- it is a debilitating exercise that will naturally bring on depressive symptoms. Just this week I have counseled two twenty-something young women churning inside this kind of mindset right now. One is having trouble sleeping at night, cannot ever rest her mind or spirit, is precariously thin, and feels she has lost connection with her family in some sense. She has needed the encouragement from her parents, but because of their own intrinsic struggles, they have not been able to give any of this support to her.
So, this young lady is stuck in this vacuum of "self" - churning around in her heart, head, and soul, the inclination that she cannot control any part of her life because she does not have what she needs from others. While she has an outstanding philosophical knowledge of God and His Word, her personal relationship based on faith and grace is stilted and ineffective at this point.
The other young woman has been hit with the same thing. Her family base is far away, so she has thrown the dice of her heart and well-being into the hands of friends in this city. When she faced an incredibly difficult family situation that shook her to her very core, instead of concentrating on God's grace, mercy, and power, she concentrated on what she was NOT receiving from her friends. After dwelling on this for quite some time, she made the blunt, but not unpredictable decision to break off all ties and find new friends, a new support base.
Perhaps there is a time and place for that kind of action, but it is not the ultimate answer to any problem in life. The clear and harsh fact is that people will disappoint us, even those who are joined to us at the hip, so to speak. If who we are is all about how others treat us, what they say to us, what they do for us, how they hold us up and encourage us......then we are in serious trouble. Lehman Strauss, in his sermon on depression and the Christian, spoke of the self-centered nature of many depressed Christians, and how it is difficult to see past how life/others have treated them. He, too, had counseled numerous Christians who had succumbed to the belief that life had dealt unfairly with them. Anytime we dwell on the fair vs. the unfair, we will lose the reasoning battle. It is a dangerous and defeating place to dwell.
Both of these young women are experiencing varying degrees of depression. Instinctively, I do not believe that either of them are chemically imbalanced. Yes, the correct diet can help some, exercise can always help, and perhaps taking herbs and vitamins can diminish some of the symptoms of depression.
But, ultimately, we have to face up to the reality that there is no one on this earth who is completely responsible for us. However, there is hope. God paid the price through the giving of His Son to the death of the cross more than 2000 years ago to prove that He, and He alone, is willing and totally able to take responsibility of us: body, soul, and spirit.
In essence, the penalty of living an "all about me" life is constant pain, loneliness, and disillusionment with those around us. When we refocus our eyes on God, our Heavenly Father, and His desire to make us complete through His Son (Colossians 1:18), it is a step in the right direction. Focusing extrinsically on others is a healing balm like none other. Dwelling on the amazing beauty found in this earth is like fresh, cool water to a dry throat. Looking outward and upward is the key to stepping out of the pothole of disenchantment with life as we see it from our inner eyelids.
Let's open our eyes and step into the Light.
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